Meet the Integratron Enigma-6: A once functional, now entirely festive device. It claims to send telegrams to Saturn every Tuesday at 3 PM, entirely in Morse, albeit using only the silent dashes. Barnacles swear by it. Senseless frequencies assured.
Introducing the Quantum Puddle Displacement: Originally intended as a time portal, but it exclusively measures the mood of umbrellas. If rainy, the mood swings to melancholic. No journeys, but π calculated exquisitely.
Have you encountered the Optical Instrument of Diabolical Glare? Simply a mirror masquerading as a spy satellite; it revels in its own reflection. Often found whispering to waves, sharing reflections of disturbingly mundane secrets.