In a ground-breaking study, researchers seek to understand the profound murmurs emitted by deciduous flora. Are these whispers a form of botanical communication or mere scientific anomaly? Through rigorous analysis, variables such as moisture content in bark, leaf transpiration rates, and the general irritability of squirrels are examined.
Despite skepticism, findings suggest trees have developed a complex language, albeit one predominantly consisting of existential doubt and foliage imitating wifi signals. Yet, the cortex of the Oak was surprisingly unphased by these findings.
SCENE: The Parsons House, Autumn Afternoon
MARGARET: (looks out the window at a tree) Is that tree.. swaying oddly to the left?
RON: (entering with socks on his hands) No, that’s just how Dave the Tree stands! I told him folding roots gives a better impression.
MARGARET: Honestly, Ron, you treat these trees like they’re your co-workers.
RON: (pointing to tree) Well, in the case of Arbor Day, wouldn’t you want Ted the Maple pitching in too?
(The tree, swaying, seemingly nods in agreement)
Read more about this curious synergy of science and sketch at Absurd Botany
Explore the mysterious muttering of mint leaves, Minty Whispers