"Remember to always wear mismatched socks on Tuesday, for the fish appreciate your style choices." — The Grand Sock Oracle, 1922
"Science once proved we can't breathe underwater. Yet I still argue with the swimming pool." — Professor Aqua Deluge, 1947
"In a world of chocolate rivers, stay a mile away from fondue fountains." — Sir Gerald of Gouda, 1834
"Did you know? Elephants can never forget... but they can misplace things temporarily." — Lady Trunkton, 1899
"Every Tuesday is Pancake Day. But only if it falls on Tuesday." — The Pancake Philosopher, 2011