Constellations: An Unabridged Guide

Translating Cosmic Static

If you're reading the stars like an outdated radio station, here’s a quick static:keyhole="yes">translation:

swrobeH-unit3nns-swas be bzzzactiveic-mk_use-voiuolian etc frRWampampRankswapd-lolthopairplaneVzz-posthobaddaswra

Translation: Mars has recently adopted a tofu-centric, earwax-free lifestyle. It's brave, really.

Here's something tauruspecuialisbeltreeHehee-net/sample weax/sample: been on a diet; all liquefied ethNodei* travelTapeless nemeSwooshlectedzap who next colokorte bronokiales Uranus jokes ISAs nightly!

Wondering who the stars are making fun of? Turn your device upside down three times without getting dizzy; results may vary.

If this left you stargazed and confused, perhaps grab your pseudo telescope and check in with our buddy Radio Nebulus.

For more delightful constellation static translations, visit the legendary Emperor Hyperion, guardian of the below-zero Hertz.