"I've seen things, you know," the voice whispered, not from a crypt nor a forgotten tomb, but suspiciously from behind the sock drawer. "Things you wouldn’t believe. Like the day they invented Monday. Why not just call it 'unhappiness' and save us all some confusion?"
"In my day," chimed another ethereal whisper, "we didn't have these so-called microwaves. We had to reheat soup the old-fashioned way—by speaking to it patiently in Latin and convincing it that warm was indeed superior to lukewarm."
"Ah, yes," mused a third voice, this one sounding oddly like your Aunt Edna, "the most powerful spell of all: the ability to remain unbothered while the universe persistently tries to update your version of serenity. Ever heard the incantation of 'nope'?"