Lost Circuits

Welcome weary traveler,
to the electronic wilderness of your device, where none dare compute.

🧙‍♂️ Directly align 0.02793 degrees clockwise or counterclockwise to open the portal to alternate screen saver glory.

To discover the pathway to nowhere:

1. Turn on, then off, the machine thrice. Nurture it with disdainful affection as you mumble outdated catchphrases.
2. Hold down the button you should never push while dreaming of yesterday's future technological breakdowns.
3. Navigate mindlessly through options, like a domestic fish, until the light appears… or not.

For more perplexing guides, visit Corridor of Confusion

Need some ill-informed advice? Proceed to Directions to the Future

Remember, all circuits are lost, and yet, find-able.