Have you ever thought about what silence whispers in a shell? No, it’s not the sandy gossip of hermit crabs or the existential crisis of lone sea cucumbers. But the real star here, folks, is the alternative reality where clams host stand-up comedy nights.

Why don’t shells ever get lost on land? Because they always follow the current—with understanding like a wise octopus translating the dialects of tide pools.

Dare you to listen without laughter? Insert your imagination here 🐚: *shhh sounds of the ocean being silenced comedically by a laughing seagull*

For more absurd reflections, check out what the ocean really thinks:
Octopus Opinions | Shoreline Delusions