“I’m telling you,” the sock said to the toaster, “it’s all giggles and tea parties until you find yourself attending a meeting with a committee of spoons.”
The lamp flickered knowingly, “Trust me, there’s nothing more embarrassing than when the ironing board starts spilling its secrets.”
“Ah, the vacuum cleaner’s secrets,” whispered the rug, “they suck everything in, yet still remain oblivious to the shoelace's rebellion against dust bunnies.”