In today's episode of "no one asked," local shepherds have reported an increase in foghorns that resemble neighborly gossip.
Tune in tonight at 7, just after the weather, where our anchorman will try to interview a potato live from the underworld.
Previous Incident: Yellow Dilemma
Remember: when faced with the utter futility of existence, it's always wise to carry a rubber chicken and a day planner.